Are you empathic? Is it YOU or is it THEM? Empathy is part of human nature. I feel that all people are empathic to some degree. It is a naturally occurring energetic outreach that some possess to a greater degree than others. Being empathic can help steer a person away from trouble or propel one to the aid of someone in need. However, empathic ability can also work against us. An empathic person could spend a short time with someone who is anxious, and then become anxious for no reason. An empath may stand next to a complete stranger on line who is experiencing great sadness in their life at the moment, causing the empath to become overwhelmed with sadness.
Being empathic is a double-edged sword: it may help you understand what is going on with people around you by allowing you to sense other’s feelings, but if you don’t let those feelings go, you can wind up doing “take out,” and have other’s emotions and feelings nest in your head for minutes, hours, or even days or weeks. This is where empathy must be checked at the door.
Antisocial Media
You don’t have to be in close physical proximity to get walloped by the energy equivalent of a mood swing. With so many glued to social media today, one little negative comment on a post can send a person spiraling for the day. Social media has allowed everyone to have a voice, but for some “mouse and keyboard warriors” it might be best to think twice before making emotional comments or “getting the knives out” via those angry emojis.
But this is life, and the reality is, people will often say or write things without thinking or do it to express pent up emotions, or hurt people from the safety of hiding behind anonymous online accounts. Some of us read it and react, others simply ignore this type of behavior as the new normal. But if you have strong empathic ability, you might actually feel those little angry emojis coming to life (courtesy of an unrealized empathic link) that is delivering someone else’s unwanted moods your way.
Typically an empathic experience happens in close proximity with another person. Some people are very psychic though and can feel other’s moods from a distance. How long or how far one can mentally link to another is unknown. Negative social media interactions could start your empathic wheels turning, but these experiences are far more likely to stir up old memories rather than rekindle an empathic line to someone you dislike. Negative reactions to online experiences just remind us that we still have to let things go. If you are empathic, you should work on disconnecting from those unwanted old energies.
“But how can I let go of energy?” you ask. Welcome to the world of being empathic, online or in-person rarely makes a difference when it comes to energy. Think about it for a moment. Someone types a message to you and it comes to your phone or computer—through the air. Why couldn’t empathic energies do the same? If only there was an “unfeel” emoji! Keep reading…
Energy Vampires. Most of us have probably met someone in our lifetimes who we could refer to as “negative” or “an energy vampire.” Some people seem to actually benefit (and thrive) from making people feel bad or unloading their problems on a daily basis. The world is full of negativity today and many have told me they feel overwhelmed. As a medium, I can feel the “zeitgeist” as energy changes in the world. Sometimes I feel localized energies flowing in from others, sometimes it is simply flowing from everywhere.
Feeling things is OK. If you are alive, you will sense things around you. If you are empathic, you may also sense things that others are feeling, and those extra thoughts and feelings can become overwhelming. This is where the empathic person reading this needs to understand that there is a “shutoff valve” for this ability, or at least there are ways to “turn down the volume” of these incoming feelings is in each of us, but many do not understand the process.
Know when to get help. I want to stress that this article is about having psychic/intuitive sensitivity to other’s feelings, it is not intended as an entry in a medical journal. Not everything you feel is empathic. Example: Casual contact with a person who is anxious (but may not even be showing it) which, in turn, makes you anxious, could be called empathy. Being around someone who is abusing you verbally or physically, and making you feel bad, is not empathy, it is a human reaction to another’s abusive behavior. There is a big difference between the two scenarios, and they should not be confused. This blog is not about those who may be going through abusive relationships. You should seek help if you feel you are trapped in that type of situation.
A comparison of what is, and what is not, empathic: You are only around someone for a moment or two. Suddenly, without them saying a word, you start absorbing that person’s emotional feelings. Next you do “take out” and those feelings stay in your head for an hour, or even a day. This type of experience could be deemed as empathic. However—feeling down, worthless, or anxious for long periods of time is not empathy, it could be a symptom of something more serious. Only a medical professional can diagnose and treat these types of things.
Again, there is a big difference between empathic feelings and those feelings that may be caused by medical issues. I am a psychic medium who deals with empathic and psychic energies and abilities, and that is what is being discussed here. I’m a medium, not a doctor. This information should not take the place of prescribed medical advice. Again, sometimes it is not empathic ability at work, there could be a more serious medical issue that needs attention. If you are constantly experiencing negative thoughts and emotions or are feeling despondent or hopeless, please consult with a medical professional. Read on…
Being empathic at the office: “John” is having a bad day. He comes into work and without saying or doing anything, his co-worker “Mary,” who is empathic, starts feeling his negative mood. John may have simply had an argument at home, but Mary does not know the details, she empathically feels his anger, resentment, or any other psychically-broadcast emotions that John is giving off at work. Soon Mary is overwhelmed with the feelings which now start to trigger memories of old events from her own personal life. This has a cascade effect with Mary recalling events that made her feel the same way, even though those events may have long passed, and she has no idea what made John angry. At the end of the day, John may have gotten over his issue, but Mary does “take out” and brings the feelings home, where they may continue to percolate in her head. Meanwhile, John is home, has gotten over his issue from the morning, is having a beer, watching TV, and relaxing. Mary can’t fall asleep. It is the classic example of an “energy dump.” I am not sure if empathic energies reach out to those working from home, but some people do seem to have the ability to “broadcast” their heavy moods!
Empathic ability works hand-in-hand with one’s own personality
Depending on what type of person you are, being empathic can either be a gift or a curse. If you are a “giver” or a “fixer” by nature, being empathic can be like too much caffeine. You might be drawn to people you feel need help or seem lost. Some of those people may not need or want your help. If you are the more nervous type, the random feelings from nowhere could make you anxious, your mind may start to lose focus on the task at hand and wander as you pick up the emotions of others.
An empathic person shopping for groceries could suddenly feel overwhelmed by someone, unseen, in the next aisle who is having a bad day. An empathic person’s feelings are rarely alone. Someone who is extremely empathic may start to ask themselves, “Is it me or is it them?” As I mentioned above, the two streams of thoughts (your own and those empathically imported) often get tangled. This doesn’t mean you are psychically eavesdropping on people; empathic feelings rarely have dialogue. They are usually raw feelings or sudden blasts of emotions. These can be both positive or negative and can linger. Empathic feelings eventually dissipate, but they can become distracting or overwhelming at times.
Don’t beat yourself up!
Some people think extreme cases of these intense feelings equate to a form of “psychic attack.” Personally, I don’t feel that one person can intentionally direct negative energy against another person on a psychic level for long periods of time. Bursts of strong feelings, yes, but sustained psychic attacks are highly unlikely. Fear, anxiety, and an over-active mind on the part of the person experiencing these “attacks” are the more likely culprits in cases like these. Most of the time, I find that empathic people carrying around residual emotions are just going through a long empathic energy digestion process. It can take time to release what we absorb.
Blocking the doorway
When I channel, I read energies/thoughts coming through from spirit. These energies flow to a medium through a “doorway” that surrounds each client. The energy from spirit is a lighter very pure feeling, much lighter than what I feel from the living. Spirits are usually trying to bring positive energies to their living family and friends. I sometimes feel that energy being blocked by the living person in the doorway. This can happen when someone will not (or cannot) let negative energy go.
This energetic heaviness is coming from sources on this side of the doorway, meaning from living family and friends. Empathic emotional residue is like plaque buildup on a soul. This residue of unwanted feelings can slowly become integrated with one’s own feelings. It is sometimes difficult to differentiate between the two. Empathic people may have trouble dealing with this mixture or personal and external feelings. This is why I think many with psychic or intuitive ability suffer from anxiety: Too much input from unknown sources.
It’s not always about being empathic
If you catch yourself suddenly distracted with feelings that have come from nowhere, you first need to make sure that you are not still perseverating on some old issue of your own. We humans tend to hold onto things longer than we should. If you think you have let things go, but the feelings keep coming in and you cannot explain why you are feeling the way you do, you could be picking up those feelings from someone nearby. Sometimes though, it’s tough to admit to ourselves that we really are not over something. If you really think the feelings are emanating from an outside source, some energetic posturing could help. If you have natural ability to receive energy, you also have the ability to allow that energy pass through you, but you have to want to make that happen.
Meditation is a great way for those with empathic ability to clear their energies
First, leave your phone somewhere else, in the next room, in a drawer on silent—just get rid of it for the meditation! Phones and meditation do not work, they are too distracting. For my meditation, I sit quietly, put on some white noise or meditation music. Next, I relax my breathing, and ask to connect with my highest spirit guides. Next, I envision white light from this “higher source” coming down around me, protecting me, and clearing out anything I no longer need to carry with me. I ask that other’s energies which are negative be disconnected from me and envision those as flowing away. I see the white light as fluid, letting it flow around me and through me, then into the ground below, taking away anything negative.
Before doing this meditation, it is important to remember that higher spirit guides cannot take away your excess baggage or disconnect you from other’s negative energies—unless you allow it (or really want it). Choosing to hold onto something bad that has occurred in your life and rehash it over and over is a personal choice. You have to have a heart-to-heart talk with YOU, before you meditate. Make a pact that you WANT to let go of these old, negative thoughts and energies.
This type of letting go needs to be done in stages. It is a behavioral change (positive thinking) as well as an energy exercise (disconnecting incoming negativity). The two go hand in hand. It takes practice and repeated reinforcing. It means changing one’s ways of thinking to stop reaching for negative thoughts first, realizing what energies do not belong to you, and agreeing to let these feelings pass through you. Garbage in, garbage out.
Is this type of meditation a “one for all” fixer upper?
No, it’s not a panacea for making one instantly free of all negativities. We are only human and life is filled with positives and negatives. Each of us should work on refocusing on more positive things, but at our own pace.
If you are constantly being affected by someone else’s unwelcome energies, add this to your meditation: Envision yourself in white light, some even suggest envisioning the perpetrator of the negative energy in pink light which insulates you from them further. In your mind, wish the person the best, see him or her as being put in your life path to help you learn a lesson, and then envision energetically putting some distance between you and that person.
The negative energy may keep flowing, but you will no longer accept it into your personal space. Of course, if you know the person well and have a good rapport with them, you could always try taking a shortcut and say, “Can you please stop being so negative?” It’s usually not that easy to fix someone, as negative behavior is hard to change.
My high school psychology teacher said it best, “A person can only take advantage of you if you let them.”
The same goes with empathic energy. Other people’s energies only affect you if you let it. You may be stuck with that “special someone” in your life who is dumping his or her emotional energy on you, and maybe you can’t physically get away from them, but you do have the power to not accept their toxic energy personally. It takes practice, but you can learn to let that energy pass right through you. Just don’t let personal feelings get in the way. Sometimes a little energetic distance is very healthy. You can still love someone from afar.
Just click your heels and think positive thoughts.
One of the more playful meditations I have taught to those with ability, I call “The Glinda Method.” When you encounter your next energy vampire, do like Glinda, the Good Witch of the North did to the Wicked Witch of the West in The Wizard of Oz, break the negative energy by laughing (in your mind) and thinking, “Oh rubbish! You have no power here, begone…” Try not to see a house dropping on the person as well, let’s keep it all spiritual!
Think positive— and remember that “take out” is best served by your favorite food establishment, not from someone else’s bad day.
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